On Media, Celebrities etc.

The following post does not contain my own views. The information supplied is by a friend who is awaiting his IIM results and can’t get over the fact that Media is obsessed with Ash-Abhi wedding. A story in his own words :

” I recently made a call to the top executive at this media company – @#$%. Firstly, I must thank the guy for picking up the phone…..i am an ordinary man and he was not supposed to talk to me – bt somehow he did manage to. I will recount the conversation verbatim:

I : Sir, I have seen blatant disregard of certain burning issues on your news issue

D (Top Executive) : So??

I : ummm….well, it seems the only thing your channel can highlight is the wedding of two stars of the film industry. There are more burning issues at hand

D : I think you have gotten it all wrong.

I : So, you do plan to cover other burning issues ?

D : Not at all, I just meant that this wedding is the most burning issue.

I (confused) : But, its just a wedding !

D : Just a wedding ? How dare you ? These are the two most successful people in film industry !

I : but…….

D : No buts, do you know who all are coming to this wedding ?

I : why should I bother ?

D : What does that mean “Why should I bother ?” Listen kid, you are wasting your time – this wedding is a matter of national urgency.

I (getting irritated) : I did not see you giving such coverage to the plight of farmers in Vidharba !

D : What about Vidharba ?

I : An average of 10 farmers committing suicide everyday – because they are too poor to buy seeds

D (thinking) : I did not know that….(to himself) It might make for a good 10 min slot……Listen, Are these farmers connected to any political party ? Better Still, are they in minority ?

I (flabbergasted) : No !

D : Then, what use are they ?

I : But, 10 farmers everyday…..don’t you think that’s telling on the Indian Agricultural Scenario?

D : What good are dead people ? And what about the Agri…what ? Anyways, most of our time slots are taken by this wedding…we don’t have time to show deaths and misery

I (giving up) : And what about the IIM / IIT fiasco – the reservation issue ?

D : Too banal. We Have already covered it. Besides, it does not come under our policy of supporting minorities

I : What about the future of 1000’s of aspirants ? What about the standing of IIM / IITs as global leaders ? Wouldn’t their repute take a strong hit ?

D : The country is committed to protection of minority rights – As for general candidates, they have been rich and educated for centuries. Surely, they need no protection.

I : but…..

D : Listen, its a very complicated issue. You can come to our channel for the weakly debate and express your opinion. I am sure we would be able to change it.

I : What ? Change my opinions ?

D : Ya….of course. That’s what we have been doing for decades now – shaping and re-shaping public opinion to suit our interests.

I : Your interests ?

D (Hastily Adding) : No, No – I meant the country’s interest

I (confused and angry) : You don’t understand ! The problem is that THIS WEDDING is attracting too much attention

D : What is your problem ? The whole country is tuned in. Why do YOU bother ?

I (angry) : Because, this is a f***ing news channel , for god’s sake ! You should report NEWS- not a goddamn wedding !

D (losing temper) : If you had any idea how much I got paid to cover this wedding……..

I : So, thats the deal ?

D : Yes, that’s the deal. Do you think we are in the least bothered about the plight of poor people or of the country losing hundreds of talented students ? What good are these issues ?

I : What’s wrong with you ?

D : What’s wrong with me ?  If anything is wrong, its with your whole goddamn country ! We need news items that the whole country watches with bated breath ! We just show them what they want to see……..

I : Well, to an extent……

D : Hey listen, I have to go….Some new footage of the wedding has come up ! One of our reporters climbed atop a tree and took exclusive pics of aishwarya’s cousins’ pet dog. Of course, he broke a leg in the process , but getting exclusive pics of the pet dog……..worth the effort !

I (giving up) : sigh

D : (hangs the phone)

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PS 1 : While he was recounting his conversation, I was busy watching exclusive pics of aishwarya’s cousins’ pet dog…..I might have added or left out a few things by imagination.

PS 2 : My own view on the topic is one of continued, sustained indifference.

PS 3 : I have nothing against the media. However, my friend believes that it is a bunch of idiots.

PS 4 : I believe the media coverage is extremely warranted in cases where children fall into potholes, men drive their cars while sitting on passenger seats…….. and the latest is this wedding, of course !

PS 5 : Media is doing a great job by advertising the wedding…people are really concerned about this grand wedding

PS 6 : It is in general public interest that the filth and squalor of society be ignored…..and instead, focus be on grand weddings where we can see celebrities getting high and wild

PS 7 : Why do I not see a single dollar being paid in charity by ” celebrities “. I guess their desires are much more than that of 60% of our population which lies below poverty line.

PS 8 : Oh, I have nothing against celebrities too…..My friend though, believes they are all a**holes.

PS 9 : The views expressed in this post are those of my friend. I am merely responsible for the exclamation marks.

PS 10 : Everybody has an agenda. Except me.

Aishwarya Abhishek Marriage

There is a situation of national emergency in India these days…..the beauty queen of yesteryears is marrying the current heartthrob of the nation!

This is a matter of grave importance and probably the news of the year……never mind the Noida massacre, he’s just a maneater yaar- whats the big deal?

THIS is huge – Abhi has proposed to Aish and apparantely, they are getting married sometime…….

Lets look at Aish first. After successfully having ruined the career of a certain Mr. “I got called 56 times from her ex” and formerly having had the distinction of driving that ex to a situation of complete despair; she has successfully managed to catch hold of another young man. Lets see how she successfully manouevers the latter’s career to a path of complete futility and annihilation.

And now, Abhishek. Being the son of a great actor, he sure know how to handle publicity. With the hair band (which, btw is passe in France) and the rough looks (read: no physique), he has captured the fantasy of many young women. I have never known what is worse – his physique, his dancing skills or his acting.

It is amazing how these stars have had the better of “intelligent” junta. I have often wondered how stars suddenly develop a mutual attaraction for each other days before a movie is released and as soon as the movie bums, [let me quote shakespare] “Love’s Labour lost”

but, I think you would be incensed at my comments. After all, u r used to seeing Shahrukh dance (to crowd) at weddings’ of gangster- that reminds me, don’t eunuchs (Hijre) do this too at low-budget weddings? oh, but eunuchs have no other source of living, i guess……….

PS1: more to write on this…….

PS2: I am not against dancing….

PS3: Am real vella these days…….

c&b

i hope no one puts up a copyright infringement on me